Kathryns Walk

After a brief but loving chiding I've received from a few close friends, here's an update. The chemotherapy and stem cell transplant didn't do the job. Cancer is unchanged in me, neither for better or for worse. The radiation last year slowed down the tumor in my chest, and no new ones have appeared. Turns out my cancer and bone marrow are just as stubborn as I am. Sometimes stem cell therapy doesn't work, they tell us. That was disappointing, to say the least. Pain is a constant companion, dulled at least by the medications they give me. Beginning in a few days, I begin weekly treatments, which could last the rest of my life. Or as long as we can afford them anyway. Don't get me started about politics and medical insurance please ;-) What goes through your mind when you learn the name of that thing which will probably end your story?  Plenty. Such a combination of sorrow, depression, but also joy over the wonder of this earth, the things and people you've been ...

  I'm coming back to life. Sometimes I feel bad, like the chemo is still inside me. But most of the time I feel better than I have for a year. My body is resilient and healing and snapping back to where it needs to be. I'm so grateful for Swedish Hospital, for Kaiser Permanente, for my husband Dave, and for all of you who have been so supportive over the past year. I truly couldn't have done this alone and I love you all more than you can imagine. New challenges and achievements are coming, and I can't wait to experience them. Hard work will pay off, and life will be good. Thank you so much for caring about me and walking with me through the last year!

This time tomorrow we'll be over at Swedish and the chemo will be dripping into my veins. I'm a little depressed and anxious. I know that it will turn out okay, but the next few weeks will be an ordeal. Three days from now they'll put my stem cells back into me, and the process of rebuilding my body and bone marrow will begin. I appreciate all of you who have supported me through this, more than you can know. Please send prayer/positive thoughts/meditation that I will be able to do this outpatient and don't have to stay in the hospital. That will be the best possible thing that can happen over the next three weeks.

 

And now the battle against bone cancer moves to a new battleground. Today we’re at Swedish Cancer Institute, where I’ve just gotten my first shot of something called GCSF . That’s a drug that will stimulate my bone marrow to produce stem cells and release them into my bloodstream. The purpose of flooding me with new stem cells is to harvest them, next week. These little soldiers will be set aside to save my life in about 3 weeks, after my bone marrow is destroyed in one shot by something called Melphalan. Sounds dramatic I know, but this treatment has been done so many times to so many Multiple Myeloma patients that we’re virtually certain it’ll work. The treatment will prevent any new tumors for years to come. They tell us that the shots will cause bone pain, and they’ve given us instructions on how to deal with it. There will be 3 more weeks of feeling relatively better before the battle to come in March. How do I feel? A little scared to be honest. This is serious stuff. But more th...

We get February off from chemotherapy, to collect my stem cells, and to rest and recover from the past 5 months of weekly treatments. Get me healthy, mind & body, and prepare for the upcoming intensive chemo. It’s been almost two weeks since my last treatment and I’m feeling better already. I’m starting to enjoy eating again, and most of the nasty side effects are fading away. I get tired easily, but I feel my body starting to be resilient again. We don’t need anything right now, other than your positive thoughts. Thank you for caring!

 ...when even water tastes bad? Iced tea. Iced tea with lemon. Gatorade. Crystal light. Anything with flavor. I can't even drink water now.